spenceroni

HI. This is me these days

This is my bedroom

and This is Costello, the cat that lives in my garden.

I have got chronic October sickness again. I haven't had it in three years now. Last time, I was sixteen amd having cuddlefits daily and having crushes on girls who would never love me, but had always left me. I was sicker then than I am now. I coughed everyday all the time from i don't know what, from October clear into November last time this happened. This time I have had sinus pressure like no othe i have ever felt before and a congestion in my brain from the crazyness. I am disinterested in school, as I was then, and now, I am rethinking the minor and possibly even some time away from architecture. I am still feeling alone as i was then, but in a healthy way. I don't mind being alone, I am trying to reinhabbit things about the computer which i find fascinating, lik ethis thing. I have also started compiling a paper community journal. Technology has got me all bent out of shape these days. and when I say that, I by no means say that i am transforming myself into Frank Ghery, but I am saying that for all teh advances there is an equally impressive or in my case depressive setback in society. Any ways, I am just questioning the origins of things, why I am doing them now, and what's responsible and finding myself of this haze wherein I am becomming more social, because we are social beings, reading more, because reading other writing enables us to transinhabit ourselves and nursing a would be ear infection with homeopathic medicines and hoping that the pressure continues to dissipate. Three years has taken me on such a crazy path. And i need to be surrounded with friends and people that i Love, and literature and art and I need to cook, and be idle, and eat on my floor, and sing and dance.

last evening i had the pleasure of attending ben folds in concert at my school. I worked all day and then fell asleep, missing the first few songs of the opening act. It was a great set. The highlight for me was definately "one angry dwarf and 200 solemn faces" That song continues to be my anthem. Its weird that ben folds always puts me in a social mood and makes me really happy. He has gotten me through breakups and breakdowns and it was nice. I went with a compadre of mine. She enjoyed the show.
After the show, I was almost hit by several cars and honked at, but i got where i was going, and i assume, so to did they. People wanna e when there is a red light for no reason. I think its dumb personally, but whatever, people gotta use all their horsepower on a 15mph road or at least get on their high horses. I treked down to the Metro, the new coffe shop on MLK, Ashley was working as i had hoped for, we shared a smile and i read an article about yoko ono in interview mag from a month or so back. I had a large black cofee and then road home, with no cars this time, and no distractions. Had a nice conversation with amy and it was reminscent. I stopped being so red with fury.
Morinng came, i took out the trash and accepted that i am not moving any time soon and went for a morning run, about to go into work for a bit and then get some studying and schoolwork done. It should be a good day. moving some furniture, adding a radiator and a couch to my living environment. have a great day folks.

good morning.

tomorrow will bring picnics and possibilities.

today has been a funny day. I woke up early to go running but couldn't find my keys. After an hour, the keys were like 2 inches away from teh first place I looked. in other news i am starting to become more aware of myself in respect to others. I ate some tasty sushi and fried tofu last evening and had a great conversation. it was really nice change to get out of the hermit hole. i have started taking more pictures. and i have switched my main riding bike to the road bike, the bmx just wasn't cutting it. anyways. i am a boy with crushes and good intentions for this day and this week and am taking this one moment at a time.

I am sitting here in the computer lab in Eichber Hall, teh Architecture building and getting some things done. I am sitting and making lists. I know that i am a list maker and I am discovering quickly where i want to put effort into socially and where I don't want to put effort in. and with this I am ok with all of it. Tomorrow morning I am going to ride hopefully. And at somepoint this weekend i will give the butterfly effect a chance to kick my ass. Enough Said. I bought cowboy boots.

this week brings new spectacles, new foods, new bike paths, and new perspectives. so whats teh big deal, that happens every week. well, the big deal is that it continues to happen. its so important to be aware that not only the things around you change, but i do too. i have come to a few new discoveries this week and i am enjoying the newfound whatever. I have been having a great deal of identity crisi and this project about identity is really doing a number on me, but i have settled a bit and am projecting myself, or at least who i see myself to be. and that changes, so too should the projection.

i am currently forging through some interesting times in savannah. for the past few weeks i have been a mixture between absolutely elated and bored. i am trying to make it a point to salvage old friendships and make new ones. it is imperative to seek out new people and to learn and enjoy life, paint, draw, find the kind of friends and the kinds of crushes i used to have. its silly that after all this time and all this effort i still think of her. and every beach will forever make me think of her, if only for a second. i need to read more, to ride more and to put my friends before myself, as well as my schoolwork and my bank account. i am debating the ideal of getting a roomate. it looks like it will happen. i am not sure how to get back into this journal thing but i will try. i will update more. and try not to be so lethargic.

So i am a delirious basketcase romantic. I like the idea of sleeping next to someone and waking up within their arms. I have switched my minor to fashion for teh time being. I am going to start developing fashion sketching skills and see how i can use architectural rendering techniques within fashion. I m impatient. i fell for a girl and its killing me to wait for a response.

at least today brings me to cold roses.

so sunday, i went to atlanta wi sh to see elvis costello. it was a great time, lots of singing to saves the day, and reminiscing. elvis played for a really long time and has reasserted himself as my number two. the guitarist for tift merritt, who was the opening act, was also ryan adams touring guitarist. so that was pretty rad, he was sicq with a q.

we saw ted turner and have like a ten second conversation with him, he had no clue who elvis costello was and he was drunk. so strange. but its been great. finished a bunch of my drawings and i thought they were due today so i am ahead of the class, i have one more board to do in two days which is like 3 hours of drawing. i am really excited to get the blueprints and pin up my work. my prof said i would get an a on the project. so i am excited again.

i get to go home soon and hang around and play instruments, and also write letters and smile a bunch becaue i am giddy for me and for her and for other giddy people.

yesterday was a pretty rad day. it started off with me waking up and just walking/running around the city. i came back, grabbed my bmx and proceeded to ride it all over the historic distric a few times. my quest for yesterday was to find a card for my friend who has been bummed out. so i got that along with my allegy medication and a few odds and ends and then proceeded to find the tanning/spa place, khours later, its this really cool space downtown that i would love to live at. the humor of a black man walking out of a tanning place practically writes itself. so i won't even go there. but nevertheless that was found with the help oessica. in the three hours in limbo i got a chance to run into the john lennon songwriting tour bus which is a fully functioning studio on wheels.click here for more info.
also the guy who runs the studio on wheels is pretty cool guy, douglas, and he is going to do great things.

after that i was going to forsyth to join up with the weekly mass that has been meeting there, no mass, but an impromptu ride with nate, who is a really cool kid and we are planning a bike trip to south carolina. we lived like 20 minutes away from each other when we were little and were both born in tennessee. its pretty freaky the way that works.

so then i got back, and started inking my final project for drawing, which is turning out pretty well except for one, but i am going to get back to that right now and bid you all a good day.

good day. go ride if you can. take a break from finals week all you scad kids.

in full force.